Monday, February 2, 2009


I find it disturbing the things that people will do in a desperate attempt to be "funny."

I had a most unpleasant experience a few weeks ago that while I have laughed over it and it has become a bit of a running joke around here, I have also been very disgusted by it.

Allow me to explain.

I was laying in bed, cuddled up with my husband, and just drowsing off into a nice deep slumber. All of the sudden the phone rang. As it was about 10:30pm and most of our friends/family know that we go to bed relatively early, I was a little surprised by the call. And a little concerned as most calls that have come at that time of night have been because of something wrong. After all, even telemarketers tend not to call that late! So I grabbed the phone.

Me: "Hello"

Unknown Female: "Can I speak to Chris?"

Me: "Who is this, please?"

UF: "This is Jessica...his girlfriend."

(momentary stunned, confused silence from me as my brain tries to wake up and catch up with where this conversation has gone)

Me: "I'm sorry, but I think you have the wrong number."

Jessica: "No, I don't. This is the house of Chris and ..........[I don't actually know for sure what was said at this point - but my memory wants to say that she said his wife]....Hanna."

Me: "Yes. But you can't be his girlfriend because I'm his wife."

Jessica: "You [I'll leave the expletives out!]....let me speak to my man!"

At which point, needless to say, I hung up the phone.

I explained the conversation to Chris as we tried to figure out what that was all about. And then after a few minutes, we settled back down to sleep when the phone rang again. We left the answering machine to get it.

The next morning, before I left for work, I listened to the message. Sure enough, Jessica - in a very non-enthusiastic, lazy kind of voice - "Hi Chris. This is Jessica. I've been thinking about you. Love you. Call me."

No phone number and seriously non-convincing in her tone. Yet rather unsettling, nonetheless.

But this is not the end of my tale. Oh no.

I went to work and was chatting to a good friend of mine there, telling her about the rather random phone call. We laughed about it, but then my friend asked a rather curious question. She reminded me of a girl in one of Chris' classes who had been rather blatantly trying to flirt with - to a point where he was rather uncomfortable around her. Could it be her?

I laughed it off. Surely not. He has made it very clear to her that he's married. She wouldn't be that stupid? Besides, her name isn't Jessica.....I think.

Then I get an email from Chris. He had suddenly put the dots together himself with this girl........and her name was Jessica.

At this point, my heart sank, and I immediately started formulating "accidental death" schemes.

End result - he listened to the message. Wasn't her. In fact, her life has taken a very different (and from my perspective - very relieving) path of having her own relationship.

Since then we haven't heard any more from Jessica and have decided it must have been some kind of cruel prank.

Many random things have since been blamed on Jessica. And yet, especially for the first few days, I couldn't help but be angry at the kind of person who would be willing to do such a thing. If Chris and I didn't have the strength of relationship that we have fostered over the years, something like that could be enough to destroy some relationships that I know of. And what kind of society do we live in that someone would think such a thing is a funny joke?

All I can say is, "Jessica, don't you come back. You'll regret it!"

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